


Zack Sabre Jr. One Shots

by ghostofviper



Category: Professional Wrestling, 新日本プロレス | New Japan Pro-Wrestling
Genre: Angst, Explicit Language, Explicit Sexual Content, F/M, Fluff, One Shot Collection, Smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-14
Updated: 2019-04-09
Packaged: 2019-09-18 08:34:24
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 5,902
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16991607
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ghostofviper/pseuds/ghostofviper
Summary: A series of one shots featuring Zack Sabre Jr. -an ongoing collection so make sure to bookmarkSee the notes at the beginning of each chapter for warnings





	1. An End

**Author's Note:**

> Warnings: Break Up, angst, language, mentions of sexual content

This was the final straw. I couldn’t take this anymore. Humiliation burned in the depths of my soul as they all laughed at me, Desperado’s leash clasped around my neck as I helplessly clawed at it. Zack sat there with a stupid smirk on his face, laughing with the rest of them. A surge of anger blew threw me and I ripped the leash from Desperado’s hands and ran from the locker room. 

As soon as I was in the hallway I ripped the damn collar off and threw it on the ground before hurrying away from the Suzuki Gun locker room. I was hallway down the hall when Zack finally came out of the room, hurrying after me with his long strides. 

“Baby!” He called, quickening his pace as I ignored him. “Baby where are you going? What’s wrong with you?” 

That had me stopping and drawing in a deep breath I spun around to ask the question that had been floating in my head lately. 

“Why do you hate me?”

“I don’t hate you. I want to take care of you.” Zack said emphatically looking sincerely puzzled that I would think that. 

“Then why do you treat me like shit?” I cried. “You don’t act like you care about me.” 

Zack looked me with confusion plain as day on his face. 

“What do you mean? I don’t treat you like shit.” He asked. 

“Are you kidding me? You don’t think you treat me terribly?” I argued. “Every fucking day you let them demean and belittle me without a word of defense. You sit there while they talk about all the vile things they want to do to me and you just laugh along with them. Not five minutes ago you let Desperado fucking collar me!” 

Zack had the decency to look ashamed, lowering his head to stare at his shuffling feet. 

“Didn’t you know it bothered me? That I have to sit there and be humiliated and degraded while my boyfriend lets them treat me like some common whore?” I asked shrilly. “How could you not know that bothered me? Do I look like I’m enjoying myself sitting in the corner with tears in my eyes? Do you not know me at all?” 

“They’re testing you.” Zack said. “They don’t want to see me stand up for you. They want to see you fight for me. Running out like this isn’t a good look for you. You should have slapped Desp upside the head. Cursed him out. Yelled at them when they were disrespectful. Instead you sat there and took it and didn’t show a back bone at all.” 

“You’re my boyfriend. You should defend me. You need to stick up for me!” I said adamantly. 

“They’re my family. My brothers.” Zack said quietly. “They’ve been there for me when no one else has. Have had my back from day one. I like you a lot. I care about you a lot and I can see a future with you, but I’m not going to choose you over them.”

Running an agitated hand through his hair Zack paced in front of me as I stared up at him with heartbreak in my eyes. 

“They’re my brothers.” He repeated. 

I sniffed and looked away from his entreating eyes, feeling like my heart was a lump in my throat. 

“I can’t play second fiddle to your self-proclaimed family.” I said. “I should be your priority and if you don’t understand that, then maybe we should go our separate ways.” 

It killed me to say it, but Zack wasn’t going to budge on the Guns and I wasn’t going to tolerate that blatant disrespect anymore. 

“Maybe we should.” Zack said pursing his lips tightly and nodding his head slowly in agreement. 

“I guess that’s it then.” I sniffed. “I’m sorry this didn’t work out Zack.” 

“Me too.” He said softly. 

With a trembling smile I turned my back and rushed away from him. I needed to get out of here and fast before I broke down. At the start of today the future had seemed so bright. I had never imagined it would all fall apart.


	2. Uniterested

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zack isn't wasting his time on someone who is obviously uninterested. Very short little piece written in request

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Language

There were far worse men within New Japan than him, so Zack Sabre Jr. couldn’t figure out why she was acting like he was going to dismember her every time he so much as glanced in her direction. He had never given her the slightest indication that he was a threat in anyway, so he didn’t get her aversion. Rolling his eyes with a scoff Zack turned his back on her. He wasn’t going to waste his time on some chit scared of her own shadow. 

For the next three days she was out of sight, and out of mind. Zack was in and out working the road to Wrestle Kingdom shows and she was off his radar. His brief interest in her had waned given her skittish behavior. Many others would take it as a challenge, but Zack wasn’t one to take the hard road. He liked his conquests easy and his effort minimal. 

It was by chance that he quite literally ran into her, chatting with Desperado and Lance when he collided with her turning a corner. Zack was actually quite impressed with how far she flew back, landing flat on her ass while he and the boys laughed hysterically. When he noticed the pure fright on her face, focused directly at him, Zack’s laughter died off. He was getting tired of this bullshit. He was the only one she reacted like that too. He had seen her interacting with others without so much as a hint of fear, so he knew it was him. 

“You don’t have to worry. I’m never going to touch you.” Zack sneered at her. “You’ve made your feelings quite clear and I don’t like to waste my time.” 

Stepping around her the trio continued on their way towards the Suzuki Gun locker room. 

There were plenty of other women angling for a chance at him, Zack didn’t need to concern himself with the one who didn’t want him.


	3. Crush

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Request prompt filled for "I thought you knew"  
> Zack has a crush on the waitress in the vegan diner

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: light language

Given the limited vegan options in the area, it was no surprise to the Suzuki Guns that Zack went to the little café for every meal. What would surprise them was the reason he went every day was not for the food. Instead he was harboring a bit of a crush that he was embarrassed to admit to. Not that he thought she was embarrassing, but he knew the guys would give him a hard time and he wasn’t quite ready to face that. Especially as he wasn’t sure if his feelings were returned. 

Instead he sat in a booth dragging his meals on for as long as possible while trying to impress her. He wasn’t sure how that was going, as she didn’t seem to give him any indication she thought of him as anything more than a customer. He liked to think that her smile was a bit brighter for him than the other customers, but that could be wishful thinking on his part. Same with him imagining she lingered at his table just a bit longer than the others. 

He was drawn to Allison for more than just her looks. Sure initially he had thought about talking her into a quick lay, but the fact she was a foreigner just like him, struggling to learn the language and make a living, struck a chord with him. His focus turned from bedding her, to befriending her and slowly interest in her as more than just a friend. 

“Our food is not that good.” 

Zack was startled from his thoughts when Allison slid into the booth across from him. 

“I beg your pardon?” Zack asked in surprise.

“I said our food isn’t that good.” Allison said with a smile. “I know we’re one of the few vegan options around, but still.”

“What are you asking?” 

Apparently he hadn’t been as subtle in his crush as he had thought. He was certain she had figured him out. 

“Why do you come here every day?” She asked. 

Zack felt a blush come to his cheeks, looking away and mumbling under his breath. 

“I like you.” 

At Allison’s surprised gasp he raised his head seeing genuine shock on her face. 

“I thought you knew.” Zack said. “I thought that’s why you sat down.”

He lowered his head in embarrassment.

“I feel like a right arsehole.” Zack muttered. “I’m sorry.” 

“Don’t be sorry.” Allison said softly reaching across the table to grab Zack’s hand. “I’m flattered…and interested.”

Zack’s head shot up and he searched Allison’s face for any sign of deceit.

“Seriously?” He asked. “Even after I made a right fool of myself you would still give me a chance?”

“What can I say? I’m a sucker for a cute idiot.”


	4. Called Out

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt request fulfilled for “We’d make such a cute couple”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: fluff. language,

To everyone else in the dance hall, Zack Sabre, Jr. had an expression of pure boredom on his face, looking like he would rather be anywhere but here. Not to you though. You knew Zack too well for that expression to fool you. He was thinking about something, thinking deeply. 

“What’s up Zack?” You asked, hopping up on the bar stool next to him before signaling for a drink from the bartender. 

“Nothing.” He replied sullenly eyes scanning the room. 

“Bullshit,” You called him out. “You’ve got your thinking face on. What’s going on in that mind of yours?” When he turned his head towards you, with that little smirk of his on his lips, your breath hitched a bit. You shifted in your seat, reaching back for your cocktail hoping Zack hadn’t noticed. You worked very hard at keeping your feelings for him hidden. The last thing you wanted to do was to lose your friendship. He meant too much to you for you to give that up. Just why did he have to be so damn handsome and lovable?

“I don’t want to talk about it,” He finally mumbled turning his attention back to the dance floor. Zack watched the couples dancing and had to hold back a sigh. That was what he wanted. He wanted love and companionship. Someone who was always by his side with words of comfort and solace after a loss and congratulations after a win. Zack wanted a relationship, but not with just anyone. No, no ordinary girl would do. He wanted you in the worst way. Nobody but you got him. You understood him on levels he barely did. Yet he couldn’t tell. The last thing he wanted to do was ruin their friendship. 

“Zack…you can’t just brush me off like that. C’mon, I’m here for you. You know I will keep pestering you until you tell me,” You teased, beaming when a smile appeared on his face. Hopping off the barstool you grabbed his arm, pulling him off his seat and dragging him towards the exit to the gardens. Smiling and chatting briefly as you passed coworkers you kept leading him until you stopped running into people pushing him down on the concrete bench on the side of the path. 

“Now spit it out,” You insisted taking a seat next to him and pulling his hand into your lap. 

Zack took a deep breath, wondering if this was the time to get it out in the open. He obviously wasn’t doing a very good job at appearing normal. Running his hand through his short brown hair, Zack shifted his long frame towards you, your knees brushing against each other. “Fine, I’ll spill. Just let me say it, and if you want to leave I understand.” 

Now you were worried, wondering what could possibly be bothering him that would make you want to leave. You reflexively clenched your hand around his, holding tighter onto him as if he was going to disappear. 

“I’m tired. Tired of watching all my friends be in these great relationships. Tired of everyone being coupled up and happy. Tired of just sitting by myself when we’re all hanging out. I feel like the odd man out. I’m jealous of them. Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy that they are happy, but I’m also jealous. Cause I want that so damn bad. But I don’t want it with just anyone. I only want it with one person.” Zack said, pausing as he gathered up his nerves. 

“Who do you want it with?” You asked, scared to hear the answer. You didn’t know if you could take being around Zack if he was in a relationship with someone else. You wouldn’t be able to be around him, because you would go crazy with jealousy. You lowered your head in shame, realizing that made you a horrible friend. You should be happy for him if he was in love with someone. Be there for him and support him. 

“I want to be with the girl I’m in love with. The girl I look at and think damn we’d make such a cute couple. The girl who is beautiful even rolling out of bed with no make-up on. The girl who makes me laugh and lifts my spirits when I’m down.” He paused looking into your eyes as you lifted your head. “I want to be with my best friend. I want to be with you.”


	5. Unwelcome Guest

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Zack ends up with an unwanted guest in the form of Iizuka's daughter in his hotel room   
> Prompt request fulfilled for “Let me help you with that.” And “There’s your thank you.” and “Just keep your clothes on!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Alcohol use, kissing, drunken stripping, attempts at drunken seduction

Zack didn’t have time to think about the whys or hows. All he knew was he was going to die if IIzuka caught him. Slowly and in excruciating pain. Which was why he was panicking and not worrying about why Iizuka’s daughter was in his hotel room, and just trying to get rid of her before Daddy came looking. 

“You have to go!’ Zack said urgently, evading the grabby hands the far from sober girl was reaching for him with and trying to get her off the bed without ending up in it with her. “Come on Eima, you have to leave. Now!”

Eima giggled coquettishly, throwing herself back on the bed and smiling seductively at Zack as his head swiveled from her to the door, while he prayed that none of the Guns would decide a midnight visit was in order. His firm resolve not to touch Eima or the bed flew out the window when she pulled her shirt over her head and threw it off, leaving her in a light blue lacy demi cup bra, the tops of her breasts spilling dangerously out the top. The only thought in his head was to keep her from removing the bra she was reaching for, so Zack did the only thing he could and jumped on top of her, his hands grabbing her wrists and pinning them over her head to stop her from further undressing. 

“Just keep your clothes on!” He said furiously, thinking of everything from socks to moldy bread to eating meat to keep his mind off the soft pliant body beneath him.

“Why don’t you take some of your clothes off?” Eima asked, her words barely coherent and slurred indicative of just how much she had drank. 

“No.” Zack said moving her wrists to one hand while he leaned back to grab the shirt she had tossed on the end of the bed. “We need to get this back on. Let me help you with that.” 

It was harder than he would have imagined getting the t-shirt back on the squirmingly protesting woman beneath him praying he wasn’t leaving any marks behind as he manhandled her into the shirt. 

“Oh Zacky, thank you.” She said catching him off guard by lurching up suddenly and planting a sloppy kiss on his lips. “Such a gentleman.” 

Surprise had his grip slackening and Eima took full advantage wrapping her arms around his neck and plastering herself to his body. 

“Good boys deserve a thank you.” She whispered, the smell of whisky strong on her breath as she murmured against this face before once again meeting his lips with hers. “There’s your thank you.”

Drawing a shuddering, calming breath Zack quickly disentangled himself and got off the bed, turning his back on Eima and willing down the erection that was quickly growing in his pants. Reminding himself of his impending death at Iizuka’s hands, Zack grabbed Eima and hauled her off the bed, practically dragging her to the door. 

“You have to go now.” Zack said practically shoving her into the hallway. “Go find your dad and sleep it off. Please.” 

He nearly fainted with relief when she smiled widely and started skipping down the hall in a rambling pattern, on her way to who knows where, but far away from his room. Closing the door Zack made sure to deadbolt it so she couldn’t make a reappearance and headed for the shower. He could only hope that Eima wouldn’t remember any of this, and her father would never find out.


	6. Unnerving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt request fulfilled for “For some reason I’m attracted to you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Fluff

“Can I ask why you are always staring at me?” You finally asked in exasperation having caught Zack Sabre Jr. staring at you yet again. You were surprised to see a slight blush tinge the cheeks of the usually overly confident man. 

“I’m not always staring,” He mumbled, elbowing El Desperado in the side when he scoffed. Cussing at Zack, Despy stomped off leaving the two of you alone as you stared at Zack with a raised eyebrow, expecting a real response to your question. It seemed everywhere you went Zack was there and you had lost count of the times you had caught him looking at you. To say it was unnerving was an understatement, you kept waiting for something to happen. Around every corner you expected some member of Suzuki Gun to jump you and you were getting tired of walking on eggshells. That was the only reason you could think of for Zack watching you, though you couldn’t think of anything you may have done to offend the group. 

“For some reason I’m attracted to you.” Zack finally admitted, keeping his eyes firmly on the ground as he finally confessed. “I don’t know why. You’re not my usual type, but there’s something about you that I like.” You stared in silence at him unsure whether you should be flattered or offended. It wasn’t exactly the most heartwarming confession you had ever heard.

“Aren’t you going to say something?” He finally asked when you just stood there staring at him.

“I’m not quite sure what to say….” You admitted. “What does I’m not your type mean? Am I not pretty enough for you?” 

“No!” He shouted. “That’s not what I meant at all.” He sighed in frustration. “God, this is why I didn’t say anything. I suck at this. You’re very pretty. That just came out wrong.” 

“I think you better tell me what you mean before you dig yourself any deeper,” You told the floundering man. Seizing his opening Zack launched into a long winded diatribe lamenting how he usually fell for the more quiet reserved girls, the ones who were content to take a back seat to his career and how he knew you weren’t that type of girl. That he knew you were loud and opinionated and didn’t take shit from anyone so he was really confused as to why he would be attracted to you when you were the exact opposite of what he usually looked for.

“Did you ever think maybe none of your previous relationships worked out because you were looking for the wrong thing?” You asked with a smirk when he finally shut his mouth. “Maybe you weren’t made for a porcelain doll. Maybe you need a woman with the guts to challenge you on your bullshit and call you out when necessary.” You chuckled at the dumbfounded expression on his face as he considered your words. You could practically see the moment in sunk in as a smile brightened his face.

“You might be right.” He conceded with a nod. “With that being said, would you like to go out with me sometime and proceed to call my ass out when I step out of line?” 

“I can’t think of anything I would rather do.” You told him with a wide smile of your own.


	7. Twisted Scheme

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt request fulfilled for “What if I say no?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: manipulation, abusive behavior, explicit language, sexual content, mentions of smut

You didn’t want to do this. The last thing you wanted to do was be involved in a wrestling feud. Especially a feud between two of the most volatile groups in New Japan: Suzuki Gun and Bullet Club. You didn’t even know why you had to be involved. Suzuki Gun had the numbers, half of the Bullet Club were in the United States. All you were was a lowly intern in the company, given the job because your boyfriend was Zack Sabre, Jr. You didn’t really do anything around here except for keep Zack happy. Now he wanted to put you directly into the line of fire by having you ingratiate yourself to Tama Tonga the bad boy of the Bullet Club. 

“What if I say no?” You asked, voice trembling. 

“You really don’t want to say no to me. Or Suzuki Gun.” Zack said with a sick smile and it was in that moment you discovered exactly why he was a good fit with Suzuki Gun. You had never been able to reconcile the sweet affable Zack you were in love with fitting in with that group, but right now you were getting a very clear picture of a Zack you knew nothing about. 

Suddenly it was like a light switched off and Zack’s face morphed into that sweet lovable smile of his as he moved closer, pulling you into his arms and resting his chin on your head. “It will be easy, he’s been panting after you since he met you. All you have to do is make him think we broke up, he’ll make his move and then you set the trap.” You tried to relax into his arms, finding comfort in his soothing words, wanting to be talked into what you didn’t want to do. Wanted to pretend your sweet boyfriend wasn’t basically pimping you out for an advantage against his opponents. 

“But Zack, what if he wants to….you know?” You mumbled into his chest, cringing as Zack’s arms tightened around you. 

“Then you do it.” Zack replied that cold voice making a reappearance. “You do whatever the hell he wants you to do, you understand me?” He asked stepping back and painfully gripping your chin in his hand. 

You quickly nodded holding back tears at the pain he was causing you, both physical and mental. You didn’t understand this change in Zack. Before he had joined Suzuki Gun he had been so sweet, so loving and adorable. Your relationship had been heaven and you knew it was going to end in marriage. However, since coming to New Japan and joining up with Minoru Suzuki’s group of thugs he had changed. A dark side you had never seen before had appeared and Zack had started acting differently towards you. You knew if you could just get him to see your side that he would leave this company and this stable your old Zack would come back and things would return to normal. 

“Okay baby, I’ll do it.” You finally gave in. You hoped if you could do this for Zack it would make him see how much you loved him and you would get his old self back. You just hoped it wasn’t going to turn out as badly as you feared. 

Voices could be heard heading down the hallway and Zack’s head jerked up, a smirk forming. 

“No time like the present.” He said softly before shoving you away from him. It caught you off guard and you winced as you landed on the cold concrete ground. You didn’t have to fake the tears, rubbing your elbow where it had painfully banged into the ground as Zack stomped off without a backwards glance. 

“Trouble in paradise?” A voice said from above you. Eyes flying up they were met with the dark brown eyes of Tama Tonga, making Zack’s actions click into place. Apparently that was your big breakup scene. You hesitantly eyed his outstretched hand before taking it and allowing him to pull you to your feet. 

“You could say that.” You mumbled staring in the direction Zack had taken off in. “He kinda dumped me.” You said with a shrug trying to make yourself sound despondent. 

“Now who would be stupid enough to dump a sweet thing like you?” Tama said flirtatiously, giving you the megawatt grin that always made the girls blush. It didn’t fail this time either, because even though this was fake it still managed to bring a flush to your cheeks. “If you were my girl, you can bet I wouldn’t be leaving you on the floor like that.” 

You smiled shyly at the charismatic man before making excuses and hightailing it out of there. Making it to your little makeshift desk you plopped down in the chair, hand moving to your stomach as it was fluttering with nervous butterflies. You weren’t made out for this subterfuge business. You weren’t a liar. You just weren’t very good at it. Zack knew this, so you didn’t know why he was expecting you to be able to pull this off. 

The next week was a real struggle for you. Zack had cut off all contact, saying it was for the best while the plan was in progress. The members of Suzuki Gun made sure they were there to give you hard time whenever they crossed paths with you and they seemed to enjoy their act just a little too much in your opinion. Of course as the gossip spread and word got around that you were no longer attached to Zack or Suzuki Gun, Tama got more brazen with his flirting and soon enough began asking you out. You made sure to show the proper hesitation, trying to play your role. Telling Tama you didn’t know if you were ready to date as you had just gotten out of a relationship. 

Another week later, knowing you couldn’t drag this on forever, you finally gave in to Tama’s request and went out to dinner with him. You were surprised to find that you really enjoyed yourself with Tama, conversation flowing easily and he made you laugh like crazy. You hadn’t enjoyed yourself on a date like that in a very long time and you felt a pang of sadness when you realized it wasn’t real. As the two of you continued dating the yearning you felt for something real with Tama grew and you were no longer able to deny your attraction to him. When you kissed sparks flew in a way they hadn’t with Zack in a very long time. You found yourself wondering what Tama would be like in the bedroom. You imagined he would be a ball of energy. The man never seemed to stay still and you could see that translating into magic between the sheets. But then you felt guilty; like you were cheating on Zack. Then again Zack was the one who had told you to fuck Tama if he wanted you. You were so confused, unsure of where you loyalty lay at this point. 

A few nights later and another date with Tama. Tonight after the goodnight kiss, you invited him inside. The distance between you and Zack and the increasing chemistry between you and Tama had tipped the scales and you were ready to take the next step with the Tongan. Pushing Zack and the pitfalls of betraying Suzuki Gun from your mind you pulled Tama inside pressing your lips frantically to his as he walked you backwards towards your bedroom. 

The two of you didn’t waste time with niceties, the sexual tension between you over the past couple of weeks having reached a boiling point and it was all smashing lips and ripped clothing as you desperately tried to get closer together. As soon as you were nude your legs eagerly parted to allow Tama access between them and he made short work of getting his cock inside you, giving a satisfied groan as he buried himself in your heat. Even rushed you were shocked at how good it felt being with another man. You were right in thinking Tama would be a ball of energy, thrusting deeply into you and flipping your body around in various positions as if you weighed nothing. You were moaning, hot and sweaty as he pleasured you, teeth and tongue trailing your upper body as he fucked you while his fingers worked your clit. You came with a scream around him, calling his name repeatedly as he brought you over the edge. 

Withdrawing from your heat Tama climbed up your chest, bringing his cock to your mouth and pressing it in as he straddled your chest. He was very thick, stretching your lips as you struggled to accommodate his girth, the tart taste of your cum lingering as he moved in and out of your mouth. Finally he came shooting his cum as he slid out finishing with a final pearly drop on your bottom lip. Eyes looking up at him teasingly you darted out your tongue and licked up that droplet with a smile. 

Tama leaned down, nipping your ear lobe and making you shiver under as his warm breath drifted over your sensitive flesh. 

“Tell Zack thank you for letting me borrow you.” Tama crooned with a dark chuckle before pushing himself off you and grabbing his clothes as you struggled to understand his words. 

“What?” You asked blankly trying to reconcile his words and actions as you came down off of your high.

“What? Did you think we didn’t know what your boy was planning?” Tama scoffed. “Puhlease. Tell Suzuki Gun to suck our dicks.” 

With those words he left your bedroom, seconds later you heard the slamming of your front door signaling his exit. You sat numbly on the bed, unable to comprehend what had just happened. Your heart was breaking as the man you had fallen for had left you behind, and all you had left was the man who gave you to him. You sobbed harder as you realized you were going to have to deal with the fallout when the members of Suzuki Gun found out you had failed in your assignment, shuddering at the thought of facing the wrath of Minoru Suzuki.


	8. Unspoken

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Song fic request fulfilled based on I Can’t Stop Drinking About You – Bebe Rexha.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warnings: Angst, alcohol use, unrequited love

He was beautiful like this. Long limbs stretched across the sheets, face lax in slumber. He looked so perfect, so peaceful. Tears filled your eyes as you knew it wouldn’t last. Before long he would start talking in his sleep, just like he did every night. You tortured yourself by staying up and listening to those words, his dreams spoken aloud. 

No ones gonna love you like I do  
No ones gonna care like I do  
And I can feel it in the way that you breathe  
I know you dream of her while you sleep next to me

It was probably your fault. You knew when you and Zack started dating that he had just gotten out of a very serious relationship. You knew that he hadn’t been the one to end it and that you were probably just a rebound. Zack didn’t want to be alone. He didn’t do well outside of relationships, so when his ended he wanted to jump right back into one. You were so in love with him that you had blindly jumped in, ignoring the warnings your mind was throwing up. He was still in love with her, you knew that. He tried to pretend he wasn’t, but his dreams didn’t lie. 

As her name passed his lips you choked back a sob, turning immediately to your bedside drawer and grabbing the bottle of whiskey you kept there. Zack always wondered why your lips tasted like alcohol when he kissed you in the morning on his way out the door, but he didn’t press past your flimsy excuses. He didn’t know that you had to drink yourself to sleep every night. He didn’t know that he spoke of her at night. Didn’t know that every night he was grabbing a piece of your heart and ripping it right out. 

I can’t stop drinking about you  
I gotta numb the pain  
I can’t stop drinking about you  
Without you I ain’t the same  
So pour a shot in my glass and I’ll forget forever

In the light of day you put on a happy face, you could pretend there when he was a loving doting boyfriend. He would shower you with affection and sweet kisses that made your heart sing. Made you forget for one moment that he wasn’t really yours. Sure you might have his body, but night after night proved you didn’t have his heart. Not really. You couldn’t tell him how he broke your heart every night. It would kill Zack to know he was hurting you like that. That wasn’t the kind of person he was. He would walk away if he knew what he was doing and you couldn’t let that happen. You would take the hurt and heartache to have at least a small part of him. 

You pretended you didn’t know why you stayed in the room. Why you caused yourself this pain by listening to his words, hearing his proclamations of love to another woman. Taking a swig of whisky you winced as it burned your throat and you quickly took another drink, praying for the numbness to kick in faster as Zack’s dream became more vivid. Tears were leaking down your cheeks, dripping onto the bottle clutched in your hand. 

As Zack’s hand landed on your thigh an uncontrollable desire filled your blood. Shame coursed through you as you knew this was why you stuck around. Deny it though you might, you stayed for the times when Zack made love to you in a half-awake state, living out his dream and not realizing he wasn’t with his lost love. You were so desperate for him you let him make love to you while calling you another woman’s name. It was the only way you got this real connection from him, a real feeling of love in his kisses and soft touches. Whispered words of love and worship as he took your body, believing you to be someone else. 

Darlin tell me what more can I do?  
Don’t you know that I was meant for you?   
You say I feel like heaven on earth,  
But you’d never know what heaven was if it wasn’t for her

He never remembered in the morning. When Zack woke up and pressed a kiss to your lips in greeting his eyes were wide and happy as he whispered good morning to you. He was so used to seeing your eyes bloodshot and red rimmed that he assumed that was just how you looked when you woke up. Zack never questioned too deeply. 

Maybe deep inside he did know. Maybe he felt the same shame for using you that you felt for letting him. He could ignore your drinking and crying and pretend that everything was perfect. Maybe he didn’t want to dig into the dirty underground of your relationship, because sometimes things are left better unspoken.


End file.
